AMH everyBODY’s Client Coping Plan aims to help people on the journey through their eating disorder, offering practical tips and ultimately hope, to ensure people know they can and will get better.

My coping strategies

• Limit exposure to triggering news or social media – If you have to check in on the news, once in the morning and once at night is more than enough.
• Implement a flexible routine, structure can help to reduce anxiety.
• Ensure you have emergency contacts written out somewhere you can easily access them – ED team, Lifeline, Out of hours GP – Southern Trust wallet card have lots of key contacts.
• Set a daily intention – One thing daily you would like to focus on – It could be an activity, organising, learning, connecting, etc
• Connect – Check in daily with family and loved ones. Just because social distancing is in place doesn’t mean there aren’t other ways to connect – Text, WhatsApp, Facebook, Skype, phone call, write a letter. Know I can also connect with professional support, Helplines and telephone support.
• Give – Myself kindness, comfort and compassion – pick one thing daily to use off your comfort list. Use affirmations of kindness.
• Take Notice – Practice grounding tools to bring you out of your head and into the present. Tapping, Deep Breathing, 5,4,3,2,1, muscle relaxation. Stop.Think.Breathe App, Headspace or Calm app.
• Learn – Read, Listen to podcasts, online virtual courses or training, perhaps use the time to explore a new interest without any expectations. 
• Be Active – Allow time for movement in a way that focuses on the body feeling good, not for punishment. A walk outside where you can safely distance, online yoga classes.

https://youtu.be/VVqJN1g2O7Y

• Coping Statements to deal with heightened Anxiety

• This is an opportunity to get to know, and accept your body at rest.
• It’s okay if eating and moving is different right now, because life and routine is different right now. What’s the same? You still need to eat regular meals and snacks, movement is meant to feel good, you’re allowed rest and food does not have moral value.
• Now is a good time to practice self-compassion as it is normal to have heightened emotions.
• You need adequate food throughout the day even if you do not leave the house.
• Eating and exercise do not require compensation, they are two separate things that we do for our body, not against our bodies.
• Resting is healthy, an act of self-care, healing and relaxing is needed for all of us. You can choose to rest without explanation. 
• We may be in a time of uncertainty, but the one thing we have in common is that we are all in the same boat together.
• Like any situation in life, whilst it may feel difficult now it will pass. We will heal and we will come through this.
• I have survived all of my toughest days so far, I can get through this too.
• We always have choice no matter what the situation is, sometimes new choices lead us to new opportunities and strengths we didn’t know we had.
• Eating is an essential need to keep me alive and well, it will help support my immune system and give me the energy to recover if I was to be unwell.
• Undereating increases anxiety and lowers your ability to think clearly.
• I have permission to rest. Health is multifaceted, the ability to slow down and rest is not lazy, it gives us time to heal and grow and recover.
• Nourishment and rest will keep my immune system strong.
• All my feelings are valid right now, my feelings matter. “I accept that I am feeling anxious right now and that is ok”
• Health is not just what you’re eating and how you move your body. It’s also about what you’re thinking and saying.
• I still need to eat even if I’m not leaving the house, my body is still working hard for me when I’m sitting still.  My heart is still beating, my brain and body need still need glucose and energy.
• Some strengths are only realised in times of uncertainty.

https://youtu.be/XLTSQLoMDrQ

https://youtu.be/jouHuHljc-E

As Eating Disorder Awareness Week continues, AMH everyBODY offers some self-help strategies people can try to improve their own body image:

• Keep a body gratitude journal. A daily routine that includes self-deprecating comments about your body is likely making you feel worse. In order to come to a more balanced perspective, it is important to start to shift your attention and appreciate good things about your body. One way to achieve this is to keep a body gratitude journal. Try to write something daily that is positive about your body. You can include things like, “I had a good hair day,” “My legs allowed me to walk to my favourite coffee shop,” or “My arms allowed me to hug a friend.” At first, it may be hard, but it will get easier with practice.
• Clean your social media feed. We are all barraged on a daily basis with images and messages emphasising thinness and/or the attainment of an ideal physique. To counteract these messages, it is important to find messages that support body acceptance and the inclusion of a range of bodies. Instead diversify your feed, read body-positive blogs and follow body-positive role models. It’s also a good idea to stop following social media sites that promote the thin or fit ideal. Hit unfollow if anyone makes you feel bad about yourself, or makes you question your own worth. Remember also that what we see on social media is only a snippet of someone’s highlight reel, not the reality of their whole lives and how they actually feel.
• Buy clothes that fit now. Wear clothes that are comfortable and that make you feel good about your body. Work with your body, not against it. Instead, buy at least a few basic items that fit now and that makes you feel good. Most people find that this leads them to feel more confident and reduces anxiety and self-disparagement when getting dressed. Remind yourself that clothes were made to fit us, we are not made to fit into clothing. A clothing size can tell you nothing about your worth as a human being.
• Challenge avoidance and stop body checking. Avoidance and body checking have been implicated in the persistence of eating disorders.  Avoidance can involve the complete covering up, refusing to wear appropriate clothes for the situation (wearing a hoody in the summer, refusing to wear shorts or a sleeveless top on a summer day, refusal to swim because of anxiety over wearing a swimsuit) or complete avoidance of doctors who might weigh them. Body checking is the repeated checking of one’s shape and weight and takes a variety of forms from repeated weighing, measuring (with a tape measure or by touch), or obsessive checking in the mirror. Avoidance and body checking only perpetuate anxiety. Those who avoid can practice gradual exposure with their ED team, and those who obsessively check can practice reducing. Exposure can also be gradual. For example, one can first wear sleeveless shirts around the apartment for increasing lengths of time before eventually venturing outside wearing them.
• Challenge negative body language. Engaging in critical or stigmatising “fat talk” – negative and judgmental comments or conversations that are focused on weight and appearance – is detrimental to body image. Avoiding such judgments (e.g., “I feel so fat!”) can improve body image. Consider taking a pledge to not engage in critical body talk. If you wouldn’t say it to a loved one, then you don’t deserve to be saying it to yourself.
• Be open about how you are feeling. If you feel uncomfortable, talk to your therapist and fellow trusted supporters about it.  Even if they can’t “solve the problem” in the moment, they can definitely share in carrying the burden. This work is hard and it is common to experience discomfort in working through these difficult emotions. Remind yourself that all your emotions are valid and that no feeling no matter how difficult it is, is ever permanent. 
• Know that cognitive distortions are real symptoms of eating disorders. Remind yourself of this when you look in the mirror. There are a lot of really helpful interventions that you and your treatment team can practice to combat thoughts like, “My arm just got bigger from eating that sandwich,” or “I will gain 10 pounds if I eat this cookie.” Your therapist can help you sort out more about how these distortions impact how you feel about your body. It can be helpful to create a list of coping statements to counter some of these distorted thoughts.
• Keep a top-ten list of things you like about yourself—things that aren’t related to how much you weigh or what you look like. Read your list often. Add to it as you become aware of more things to like about yourself. Remind yourself that your size is the least interesting thing about you.  You have so much more to offer the world.
• Remind yourself that “true beauty” is not simply skin-deep. When you feel good about yourself and who you are, you carry yourself with a sense of confidence, self-acceptance, and openness that makes you beautiful. Beauty is a state of mind, not a state of your body.
• Look at yourself as a whole person. When you see yourself in a mirror or in your mind, choose not to focus on specific body parts. See yourself as how you want others to see you — as a whole person.
• Surround yourself with positive people. It is easier to feel good about yourself and your body when you are around others who are supportive and who recognise the importance of liking yourself just as you naturally are.
• Do something nice for yourself — something that lets your body know you appreciate it. Take a bubble bath, make time for a nap, or find a peaceful place outside to relax.

Action Mental Health’s specialist eating disorder service in the Southern Health and Social Care Trust area, AMH EveryBODY offers a monthly support group, helping family members and carers provide the best support to their loved one living with an eating disorder.

Reach out for the support you may need, don’t journey alone, AMH everyBODY is here to help, please get in touch and let us help you help yourself. As Eating Disorder Awareness Week continues, this article covers many of the themes carers experience, and offers encouragement for those in a similar situation to seek help.

Carers’ questions and concerns are outlined in the following feedback received by AMH everyBODY’s project workers:

What were some of the questions/concerns you had when you first discovered your loved one had an Eating Disorder?

“Has something happened to cause this?”

“How could I have missed this?”

“Was it anything I’ve done?”

“Could I have prevented this”

“Will they ever fully recover? When will that be?”

What do you feel would be helpful for families to have information on that might have similar questions?

“Knowing the signs and symptoms. Knowing that there are just as many symptoms that you don’t see, because we were only thinking about the physical ones and didn’t realise things like –

• Isolating themselves
• Loss of interest in hobbies
• Lack of sleep
• Lack of concentration
• Control over where to eat/ Fear of eating in front of people
• Low self esteem
• Signs of perfectionism 
• Low mood/irritability/sudden change in personality

Could all also be signs that someone may have an Eating Disorder. It would be helpful to have more support from GP and to not just be given a leaflet or number for Lifeline but to have things explained a bit more, or be pointed in the direction of someone like AMH everyBODY who can support families. I feel what I needed most was guidance on how to approach the subject of Eating Disorders. I was always afraid of saying the wrong thing, or making things worse. Through the Carer Support group and 1 to 1 support with AMH everyBODY I have learnt how to be more direct and when it’s appropriate to challenge the Eating Disorder but also to communicate in a non-judgemental and supportive way.”

What things have helped you in supporting your loved one?

“Just having support for myself as well as my daughter. Being able to ask questions, and get more information to help me understand better. I understand that therapy needs to be confidential but as a parent it can feel like you’re left a bit in the dark so it helped having somewhere to go to like AMH everyBODY to be reassured about concerns. 

It really helped having the support group to come to.  Being around other families who just “got it” and understood. It made me feel more normal, like we weren’t the only people going through this. Going to the support group was also a chance to have a few hours just to myself, where I was able to speak completely freely about any fears/worries/difficulties and know I’d be met with support and understanding.

One thing AMH everyBODY and the other families taught me was that it is ok to give myself permission to recharge the batteries, to take a bit of time out if I need it. 

As a mother you sometimes want to wrap them up in cotton wool and fix everything, but there is only so much you can do. It’s been a hard but valuable lesson learning that people need to want to get better for themselves, and to step back to give them that opportunity to work through things and challenge themselves. My role is to support and encourage but not to take over and get better for them.”

What has been the biggest thing you have learnt about eating disorders as a Carer?

The eating disorder is separate from the person. The eating disorder controls the thoughts your loved one has and dictates the actions. Repeated actions become habits and the habits become the rules which your loved one lives by. Your loved one is still inside and does not want to be ill and controlled by an eating disorder. Deep down they too want to be normal and live a happy life, just like everyone else, but can’t get to that place because the eating disorder has control over them.  

What helps you to cope as a Carer on difficult days supporting your loved one?

Reminding myself the eating disorder is separate from the loved one. This helps me stay calm and rational and not allow my emotions to take over, which always makes the difficult days worse.

What advice would you give to other Carers and families that may be struggling in silence?

Talk to Deborah AMH everyBODY Project Worker: she really listens in a caring way and asks questions until she fully understands your unique situation without any judgement. This is the first step to getting the help and guidance to support carers and families to be there for a loved one with an eating disorder.

What has been the biggest thing you have learnt about eating disorders as a Carer?

Being there and available to call if we, the carers, need to make contact for advice.

Getting this information out there to those who do not know your services are available is very important.

Carers’ Insight

The eating disorder is separate from the person. The eating disorder controls the thoughts your loved one has and dictates the actions. Repeated actions become habits and the habits become the rules which your loved one lives by. Your loved one is still inside and does not want to be ill and controlled by an eating disorder. Deep down they too want to be normal and live a happy life, just like everyone else, but can’t get to that place because the eating disorder has control over them.  

What helps you to cope as a Carer on difficult days supporting your loved one?

Reminding myself the eating disorder is separate from the loved one. This helps me stay calm and rational and not allow my emotions to take over, which always makes the difficult days worse.

What advice would you give to other Carers and families that may be struggling in silence?

Talk to Deborah (AMH), she really listens in a caring way and asks questions until she fully understands your unique situation without any judgement. This is the first step to getting the help and guidance to support carers and families to be there for a loved one with an eating disorder.  

What is the most important thing families need from support services?

Being there and available to call if we, the carers, need to make contact for advice.

Getting this information out there to those who do not know your services are available is very important.

Eating disorders are not only experienced by females, and today, during Eating Disorder Awareness Week, we give an insight into the experience of one man who lives with an eating disorder in Northern Ireland.

Statistically there are more females recorded within official statistics, however growing evidence suggests that males account for between 10% and 25% of all eating disorder cases, according to local figures.

These figures are likely to be even higher however, as males are less likely to come forward and seek help for such illnesses due to the stigma and the negative stereotypes that surround these disorders.

Seek the support you need now and speak with one of our staff.  AMH everyBODY is a safe and welcoming service where we will work positively with you and agree a recovery pathway that meets your needs.

One male client, who wishes to remain anonymous, spoke of his experience: The best way for me to understand about my eating was to ASK FOR HELP.  Something I am now glad I did and something everyone should do,” he said.

“Do not suffer on your own – this only makes matters worse.  Get in touch with your GP, tell them how you feel. There is also a fear attached to us asking for help, but do not let this stop you because if you do you will feel as I did. Remember that people do care. Remember – asking for help is the very start of recovery,” he reiterated.

“Meeting my support worker for the first time I was very nervous, not knowing what to expect, but I was soon put at ease as she set about introducing herself and now I am recovering well and every week I continue to move away from my eating disorder behaviours with support.”

Read similar stories at a local charity that works solely with men living with eating disorders at the Laurence Trust – https://www.thelaurencetrust.co.uk/

Northern Ireland’s leading mental health charity, Action Mental Health (AMH), is delighted to announce their new charity partnership with McCartan Turkington Breen Solicitors (MTB), a full-service law firm in Belfast.

Action Mental Health is a charity that changes the lives of people living with mental health issues and promotes resilience and wellbeing to all sections of our community.

On announcement of the new partnership, Harry McAleese of McCartan Turkington Breen stated: “We decided to support this vital cause as part of our corporate social responsibility efforts in 2022. We know that many in our local communities have been adversely affected by the pandemic. Anything that we can do to raise both awareness of the mental health crisis and to raise money to support Action Mental Health with the vital work that they do is a positive step for change.”

In previous years, the firm has supported well-known local charities including AgeNI, Inspire Wellbeing and Addiction NI.

Throughout the year, McCartan Turkington Breen will implement several fundraising activities whilst actively promoting awareness of the mental health issues found at work and at home. The leading law firm intend to embark on a Paddle Board Challenge to kick off the partnership.

Action Mental Health have a timetable of activities suitable for people of all ages to get involved in. The charity highlights that it is always happy to work with corporate partners of all sizes to raise much needed funds and awareness of the work that they do.

Action Mental Health’s Samantha Coleman commented: ‘We are so delighted to have McCartan Turkington Breen Solicitors on our side for 2022. One in five of us will experience a mental health problem at some point in our lives and half of all problems start before the age of fourteen. Since the pandemic, the need is even greater and we are happy to be working with McCartan Turkington Breen on a series of fundraising events and awareness raising to highlight the important cause of mental health and to help fund our work.”

Action Mental Health’s specialist eating disorder service, AMH everyBODY benefits a great deal from its engagement with the local community.

This engagement not only helps to inform its specialist service remit regarding the particular needs of people living with eating disorders and their families, it also provides vital support to people in the Southern Trust and Health and Social Care Trust who avail of the service.

Through its preventative approach to eating disorder, the service engages with schools, sports clubs and community groups to to offer support and signpost signposting tpeople to the most appropriate support. In turn, in thanks of this support, beneficiaries like to give back and work collaboratively with AMH everyBODY to raise awareness and funds to support our work.

Among those to express their gratitude for the support of AMH everyBODY are the pupils of Sacred Heart Grammar School in Newry. Year 11 pupils, aged 14 and 15, are holding a sponsored walk for AMH everyBODY to help highlight the importance of prevention and awareness raising through the service’s effective BodyTalk programme.

Their initiative also aims to raise awareness of BodyTalk’s proactive approach of pupils and teachers in taking action on eating disorders.

AMH BodyTalk consists of interactive workshop within schools in the Southern Health and Social Care Trust area, which focus on:

• eating disorders – the signs and symptoms, myths and misconceptions, causes and prevention, and where to go for support;
• body image concerns amongst young people – the role of the media with fitness, beauty and diet industry, and how to be aware of dangers and challenge harmful body ideals;
• building a body positive image through self-supporting skills of resilience and confidence building.

These workshops include clips from the Dove Self-Esteem campaign,  https://www.dove.com/uk/dove-self-esteem-project.html along with interactive self-esteem group activities that offer opportunity for group discussions. Free of charge, the workshops have been received very positively by schools and colleges within the Southern Trust area.

AMH everyBODY delivers five week creative courses throughout the year to any clients with an ED engaging with the SHSCT ED team, or AMH everyBODY. The aim of the creative course is for clients to learn a new creative skill that will support their recovery, a development of their identity outside of their eating disorder. Through the course they will build resilience and confidence as creative strengths are drawn out in a safe and supportive environment. 

During Eating Disorder Awareness Week 2022, participants on the most recent Creative Writing course have shared their views:

“I was honestly so surprised at what I was able to achieve when I stopped overthinking and put pen to paper. I was initially a bit nervous that everyone else would be better than me, or that I would be stuck for what to write but there was such a relaxed feel to the group and everyone was really supportive.”

“I look forward to Wednesday now every week because I never know what I’m going to come up with. Martelle is brilliant at guiding you through and building confidence in your abilities.”

“The course has given me something to focus on at home and actually feel proud of when I read over some of the things we’ve been working on.”

“I really lost myself a bit with my eating disorder and forgot what I actually enjoyed. This course has shown me what it feels like to experience joy again and do something that is just for me.”

This week it is Eating Disorder Awareness Week – when attention is turned on the difficult relationship that one in 50 people in the UK have with the substance on which life depends – food.

Led by BEAT, a national charity which supports people living with eating disorders, this year’s campaign turns the spotlight on the minimal specialist training that doctors receive to deal adequately with the complexity of eating disorders.

Action Mental Health’s specialist eating disorder service within the Southern Health and Social Care Trust area, AMH everyBODY, wholeheartedly supports this year’s focus. And in response, AMH everyBODY works to enhance knowledge and skills – by delivering eating disorder awareness training, specifically for health care staff. Additionally, AMH everyBODY worked in partnership with the Public Health Agency to advise on content for Mental Health First Aid

On the back of this year’s global campaign, AMH everyBODY is also looking inward, aiming to also steer attention to its clients’ voices – and their own personal experiences.

Keen to be seen for individuality and not merely be defined by their eating disorders AMH everyBODY clients have been turning literary to express themselves and help make sense of their world around them and their own particularly difficulties.

This week Action Mental Health will bring you wonderful examples of AMH everyBODY clients’ creativity, news of its vital work in schools and colleges, helpful insight from carers, tips on coping with eating disorders and with body image, plus much more.