Asking for help isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength

Together For You throughout the month of November are running a campaign to encourage Men to look after their mental health and wellbeing by seeking help early.  By asking the question “Are you trying to remain strong and silent?”, Together For You is encouraging men to talk, to ask for help or to simply say to a friend or loved one “I’m not feeling myself”. Together For You is a mental health and wellbeing project funded by the Big Lottery Fund providing services across Northern Ireland.

The stigma that surrounds mental health in addition to the reluctance to admit there is something wrong is quite literally killing men, who are three times more likely to die by suicide than women (77% of those who completed suicide in Northern Ireland between 2005 and 2011 were men). Men are also three times less likely to visit their GP and four times less likely to visit a pharmacist than women (National Statistics, 2015). This stereotypical view that men should remain ‘strong and silent’ needs to change, which this campaign hopes to highlight also.  Asking for help isn’t a weakness, it’s a strength!

Speaking out and challenging the stigma of mental health is courageous, and doing so may just help to save not only your life, but the lives of other men who are suffering in agonising, lonely silence.

Dan’s story highlights that help does help……

“I have been in long term depression since 2002. I felt like no one could help as they didn’t understand. This left me isolated even more, which made the spiral downwards worse”

I then asked for help and received 10 weeks of counselling support through the Together For You project with Relate counselling to try and bring about a little awareness and understanding about how to deal with myself on an everyday basis. The counsellors helped by having an impartial view of the situation, teaching me about overcoming any problems by looking down on the problem and not seeing it from one angle only but many different views.

Counselling works but only if you let it. It can’t be used as a tool to prove you are right and the other person is wrong. It is used to be enlightening, to help you see others perceptions and maybe a perception you didn’t think of, hence you are learning about yourself.”

Other men who have been brave and asked for help have said:

“Without help, today I would maybe still be in my bedroom in my parents’ house avoiding the world instead of contributing to it and being part of it”, Michael (Together For You Beneficiary)

“Before getting help I felt frightened, confused, sad, no energy, low self esteem. Now I best describe myself as: happy, confident, high energy, motivated, high self esteem…..Loving Life!”, Jerry (Together For You Beneficiary).

So if you notice that you are feeling more stressed, sad, angry or agitated, feelings of helplessness or hopelessness, overly tired or detached from friends or family, it could be early warning signs of mental ill-health not to be ignored.

Help is available. Pick up the phone or drop us a short email

Call 028 9032 9150 or email [email protected] or visit www.togetherforyou.org.uk

The Together For You partners were out in force on Saturday (10^th October) raising awareness of ‘Dignity in Mental Health’ as part of World Mental Health Day in the Maiden City of L/Derry.  It was also an opportunity to celebrate the fact that they have reached over 30,000 people across Northern Ireland with mental health services. Together For You is a mental health and wellbeing project funded by the Big Lottery Fund. 

Hundreds of shoppers and passers-by stopped to have a cup of tea and a natter with the team of volunteers, helped to decorate the ‘Ship called Dignity’, supported by the Community Arts Partnership, and were entertained by Face painters, dancers from Echo Echo Dance, laughter yoga from the Sunshine Project and singers from the excellent Encore Contemporary Choir.  

The Deputy Mayor of Derry and Strabane Council, Alderman Thomas Kerrigan came down to support the event, and local MP Mark Durkan also popped down to see some of the activity taking place.

Throughout the day, we took a short poll of passers-by.  Out of the 62 people questioned, over 43% had accessed mental health support services for themselves or a friend or relative.  Many people (over 50%) admitted to having had or still to have problems with anxiety, stress and depression. However it was fantastic to see that over 80% felt comfortable talking about their mental health, and also a similar number who said they would visit their GP or talk to a friend or relative if they were worried about their mental health. 

The team at Together For For were also celebrating the fact that they had reached over 30,000 people across Northern Ireland since the launch of the project on World Mental Health Day in 2013. Amanda Jones, Project Manager explains,

“The success of this event today in Derry/Londonderry builds on the success of the project as a whole.  Reaching over 30,000 people in Northern Ireland is a fantastic achievement for the partners of Together For You.  It also means that over 30,000 are more likely to talk about their mental health to others, to seek help when they suffer mental Ill-health and to contribute to reducing the stigma surrounding mental ill-health. Today in Guildhall Square we built on that growing momentum with a fantastic promotional event. Thank you to all who came to visit us”.

For further information on Together For You visit www.togetherforyou.org.uk

Nearly 300 cycling enthusiasts from across Northern Ireland put their endurance skills to the test by competing in the famous, not-to-be-missed Granite Challenge to raise funds for charity.

It was hard to believe it was the 4th October with the Mournes looking spectacular in the sunshine, and many cyclists still in their summer gear!  The long distance cycle marked the start of World Mental Health week, with proceeds going towards, Action Mental Health (AMH).

The money raised will enable AMH to provide life-changing services to help those living with a mental illness to recover from its effects through reskilling, employment, support and advice.

Supported by cycling club, La Lanterne Rouge, the brave participants were put through their paces by embarking on a 55 mile cycling route that started at AMH’s New Horizons Service in Downpatrick, through the scenic surroundings of the Mournes and Spelga Dam, before returning back home via Bryansford, Maghera and Clough.

Chief Executive of Action Mental Health, David Babington speaking before the event said:

“Research has shown that exercise plays a vital role in combating mental illness, which a staggering one in five people in Northern Ireland has at one stage suffered from (Public Health Agency, 2014).

“We at AMH can’t think of a better way to kickstart World Mental Health Week than with a high endurance challenge that epitomises how determination, motivation and peer support can help to achieve something truly remarkable, despite the physical and mental barriers along the way.

“I would like to say a huge thank you to all those involved in helping us organise this incredible event and wish all the best of luck to those participating.”

With the now famous homemade traybakes a welcome sight at the top of Spelga, cyclists were also treated to homemade broth back in Downpatrick, there was also the added benefit of a soothing sports massage at the finish line for competitors, kindly provided by North Down Physio and Sports Injury Clinic.

Thanks to all those to took part and to all our volunteers and sponsors – looking forward to next year all ready – remember to keep the first Sunday in October free!!

More Photos available on our facebook page https://www.facebook.com/AMHevents