This festive season, if you’re struggling with your mental health, it’s important to remember that there’s always someone to talk to. Whether it’s in relation to yourself or someone you know, support is still available during the holiday period, should you need it.
Sarah Grant-Jones, Head of Clinical Services within Action Mental Health’s counselling service, said: “There are different sources of support available over the holiday period. Sometimes, it’s just about being in someone’s presence or talking to someone. We would always say to children and young people to go to a trusted adult.
“It’s also good to have a repertoire of coping strategies to hand, or kept on your phone. For example, maybe time-out helps you cope. And – be kind to yourself. Allow yourself the opportunity to not do more than you feel you want do or are able to do this Christmas. It’s ok not to be ok – and if you don’t feel ok, reach out.”
If you are in crisis or distress this Christmas, you can find help at the following services:
Lifeline operates 24/7 throughout the holiday period – you can call them and talk to a trained counsellor on: 0808 808 8000.
The Samaritans can also be contacted 24/7 by calling: 116 123.
For young people, Papyrus operate HOPELINE247 at: 0800 068 41 41.
If you’re struggling with bereavement there are useful resources and practical strtageies to help at: https://bereaved.hscni.net/ You can also view a video message from Health Minister, Mike Nesbitt and Dr Patricia Donnelly, Chair of the NI Bereavement Network, via the following link: https://vimeo.com/1039705079/0e3d35462e?ts=0&share=copy
While Christmas is traditionally associated with merriment and good cheer – a time for getting together with friends and family for celebration – many people struggle with their mental health at this time of year, for a variety of reasons.
Whether it’s loneliness due to the prospect of facing Christmas alone, financial stress, depression or Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD), these are just some of the reasons why our mental health can suffer during the holidays. However, it’s important to understand that, if you or someone you know is struggling at Christmas, you’re not alone – and there are things that can help you cope and make things more manageable.
Managing stress and anxiety at Christmas
According to research from YouGov (2019), more than two-in-five people feel stressed during December, with anxiety affecting three-in-ten. Meanwhile, a quarter of people said they had felt depressed over Christmas, while just under a quarter felt lonely during the festive period.
“Feeling low around Christmas is especially common among people who are unemployed (38%), divorced (35%) or widowed (31%). It’s less so, but not unusual, for parents with kids living at home (23%).” (YouGov, 2019).
In addition to this, people aged between 25-34 years old are more likely to experience anxiety and loneliness (31%-40%), with women being more prone to mental health issues in general at Christmas time (51%).
If you already experience anxiety, then the busyness of the festive season can heighten this even more, what with events, visiting friends and family, buying gifts and the general intensity of the season. Increased traffic, people, lights and noise when you’re out and about can also trigger anxiety and led to overwhelm. It can therefore be helpful to bear the following points in mind, if you feel yourself getting anxious or, indeed, want to minimise anxiety at this time of year:
Plan ahead: If you’re going Christmas shopping, choose quieter times like early in the morning or later at night – and pick a location you know is going to be less busy. Alternatively, avoid the crowds altogether and shop online – you can still support local businesses this way and prevent the risk of getting overwhelmed in busy shops.
Know the signs: If you suffer from anxiety on a regular basis then you’ll be aware of what triggers this and the symptoms that present, but some people may only experience anxiety at certain times like Christmas, when life is particularly hectic. Signs of anxiety can include feeling faint, dizzy, disoriented or struggling to catch your breath, as well as having an increased heart rate (racing heart), feeling paranoid, fearful, tense or excessively worried. When anxiety hits, you can try to ground yourself by focusing on the present moment and noticing what’s around you – name five things you can see, hear or taste, for example. Taking deep breaths – extending your exhalation so that it’s longer than your inward breath – will also help to calm your nervous system. Removing yourself (when you feel able to do so) from the environment e.g. leaving the shop to get fresh air or even just sitting down if you feel faint, can all help to manage your anxiety in the moment as well.
Set realistic expectations: Christmas can invite comparison with other people as we see images on social media of what others are getting up to, or from what we see around us in the day-to-day. However, it’s worth remembering that we never see the full picture with anyone and comparing your Christmas to someone else’s runs the risk of making you feel anxious, if you feel that you aren’t meeting self-imposed or so-called social standards. Being realistic about everything from family gatherings to present-buying and festive activities will help to reduce anxiety and take the pressure off.
Practice self-care: Remembering to take time out for yourself – stepping away from the hustle and bustle and prioritising rest and relaxation – will help to manage anxiety. Say ‘no’ to things that might overwhelm you and limit what you do over the festive season. While you may not be able to avoid the busyness of the holidays completely, you can do what you can to minimise the triggers of anxiety. Eating well and not overindulging too much, talking to someone you trust and sticking to as much of your normal routine as possible can also help.
Going for a walk can help boost your mental wellbeing.
Sarah Grant-Jones, Head of Clinical Services within Action Mental Health’s counselling service, said it was important to manage expectations over Christmas.
“Family holidays can be wonderful but very intense,” she said. “People can feel the pressure to have the perfect Christmas – but there’s no such thing. The work we do with our clients is to help them manage their expectations around Christmas. It might not be quite how they expect it to be, so it’s about how to manage that if it’s not.
“I think it’s really about knowing yourself and being aware of what works for you. There’s going to be lots of thoughts and feelings that come up around Christmas-time. It’s a very emotive time – and can be like this for lots of different reasons, for example, if someone has experienced a bereavement at this time of year. You have to be aware of that and work with it personally or within your family. Be aware that you may experience lots of different thoughts and feelings over the Christmas period – and prepare for that.”
Anxiety can be one of the main symptoms of stress, along with feelings of overwhelm and finding it difficult to make decisions. Being restless and having a constant sense of dread or underlying worry can also be symptomatic of stress, so it’s important to be aware of these signs and to look out for yourself over Christmas.
Stress can particularly affect women over the festive season: “Christmas is especially tough on women’s mental health. While women are only 4% more likely to say Christmas affects them negatively, the difference is more glaring when it comes to stress and anxiety. While … 35% of men have felt stressed around Christmas, for women the figure is 51%. Over a third of women also say they’ve felt anxious, whereas less than a quarter of men say the same.” (YouGov, 2019).
Doing what you can to minimise stress – for example, setting spending goals for gifts, asking people for help with dinner preparations, taking time out for yourself and avoiding comparison with others – can all help to reduce stress.
“If you experience anxiety or low mood, then it’s about being aware of what triggers that – and the pressure points for you,” said Sarah. “Give yourself time for how you’re going to cope with things. For example, with social anxiety – how would you feel about attending that party or big family event? It’s about thinking through what potentially may be an issue for you and knowing that, whatever you’re thinking, is ok. Give yourself permission to feel that.”
Depression at Christmas
If you have depression, then Christmas can be a difficult time to navigate, particularly when everyone around you appears to be happy and the season sets an expectation for this. It can also be hard trying to explain to others that you feel low, even at Christmas, if they don’t understand the symptoms of depression or how it affects you.
Struggling with feelings of hopelessness and worthlessness, anxiety, intense sadness and low energy can all be symptoms of depression, along with fluctuations in appetite. Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) can also strike at this time of year – either on top of pre-existing depression or as a standalone form of depression that some people only experience in winter. SAD – also sometimes referred to as the ‘winter blues’ – is low mood caused primarily during December, January and February due to reduced exposure to sunlight during the darker days of winter.
To help you or someone you know cope with depression over Christmas, here are a few tips on what may help:
Talk to someone: Discussing how you feel with someone you trust will help share the burden and make you feel less alone. If you isolate yourself then you can become stuck in your thoughts, which can create a vicious cycle of low mood. Talking to a friend or family member, however, can help prevent a downward thought spiral and ground you in the present moment. Explaining how you feel can also help you set boundaries with other people at Christmas and help them understand how they can support you.
Stay in touch with people but know when to say ‘no’: Isolating yourself can contribute to low mood, especially if you already experience depression, so it’s important not to cut yourself off from people completely over Christmas. If possible, maintain contact with trusted friends and/or family but avoid overwhelm by choosing when you socialise i.e. you don’t have to accept every invitation you receive – be selective. Setting boundaries will safeguard your mental health while also helping you stay connected, so your low mood doesn’t spiral, as being with other people grounds us and makes us feel less alone.
Be active: Keeping active helps to boost our mental wellbeing, so sticking to routines like going for a daily walk and just getting outside is important, especially at Christmas when schedules change with the holidays.
Know your limits: If you’re struggling with depression of any kind, then this is something you will also need to manage throughout Christmas. Recognising this and removing any pressure to ‘feel better’ over the festive season is important. Know what you can manage and how to handle the holidays in the best way for you. Placing unnecessary pressure on yourself to ‘do Christmas’ like those who don’t have depression is unfair on yourself and sets unrealistic expectations.
“It’s about acknowledging what’s going on for you and validating that; knowing, ‘what will help me to lift my mood?’” said Sarah.
“It’s good to have a repertoire of coping strategies to hand, or kept on your phone. For example, maybe time-out helps you cope. And – be kind to yourself. Allow yourself the opportunity to not do more than you feel you want do or are able to do. It’s ok not to be ok – and if you don’t feel ok, reach out.”
Talking to someone you trust can help you feel grounded and less alone over the festive season.
Alleviating loneliness during the festive season
Christmas festivities can exacerbate feelings of loneliness during the holidays, especially if you’re spending it alone, are divorced, separated, single or have recently been bereaved. Feeling like everyone else is having a great time together can also make you feel even more alone, even if perceptions based on what you see online or on the street aren’t always accurate.
Loneliness can co-exist alongside various mental health issues and can become a more serious problem itself, if left unaddressed. That’s why, if you or someone you know is experiencing loneliness – or anticipate it over Christmas – there are things which can help to alleviate it.
Connect with people: Whether it’s volunteering at your local animal shelter, visiting a friend or going out for a walk and just saying hello to people, find ways to avoid isolation. Spending time with people boosts our wellbeing and helps us feel less alone, while having a conversation with someone about anything at all can lift our mood and ground us in the present moment.
Structure your days: If you’re lonely and are also coping with a bereavement at Christmas, then this can make the holidays even more difficult to navigate. Planning your days and giving them a structure can help, while walking/exercise that gets you moving and outside, rather than sitting indoors watching TV all day, can also help to support your mental wellbeing.
Practice self-care: From saying ‘no’ to invitations and giving yourself time to rest, to planning activities you enjoy and removing any guilt you may feel about putting yourself first, practising self-care will help prevent overwhelm over Christmas.
Ask for help: Even during the holidays, support from the Samaritans is always available, while Cruse Bereavement Carealso provides support for those who are grieving (check online for opening hours).
“We have a safety plan that we use with our clients, with three things people can do to help work with their thoughts and feelings,” said Sarah. “For example, have three people you can contact if you need to. Think about who you can reach out to and where you can go for help.
“There are also sources of support available over the holiday period. Sometimes, it’s just about being in someone’s presence or talking to someone. We would always say to children and young people to go to a trusted adult.”
Keep Christmas on track
Taking things in moderation, avoiding comparison, practicing self-care and staying connected with people are just some of the ways you can look out for your mental health this Christmas. Whether it’s in relation to yourself or someone you know, being aware of the signs of poor mental health and knowing what to do to minimise triggers can help.
Meanwhile, setting boundaries around activities and knowing your limits for socialising can also support better wellbeing at Christmas, without isolating yourself. Talking with someone who you trust and explaining how you feel about the festive season can also help to make Christmas more manageable. Ultimately, being kind to yourself is key.
If you are in crisis or distress, please remember that Lifeline operates 24/7 throughout the holiday period – you can call them and talk to a trained counsellor on: 0808 808 8000.
The Samaritans can also be contacted 24/7 by calling: 116 123.
For young people, Papyrus operate HOPELINE247 at: 0800 068 41 41.
With our annual Festive Splash fundraising event taking place on Sunday (December 1) at Crawfordsburn Beach, we thought there was no better time to chat with someone who’s been taking icy dips on our behalf for the past year…
Luke McCrea is encouraging people to take part in this year’s Festive Splash.
Co Down-based Luke McCrea launched his own 31-day cold-water challenge last December as a personal project to help build his mental and physical resilience. This then turned into 50 days, after which he decided to keep going for the full year – but to raise money along the way for charity. He subsequently chose Action Mental Health along with Epilepsy Action, in memory of his cousin Jordan, who had epilepsy and passed away in 2014 at the age of 13.
“When I decided I was going to keep going with the dips, I knew that it would tie in with my mental health and be good for that, which is why I chose Action Mental Health as one of the charities,” said Luke. “Then obviously, in memory of my cousin Jordan, Epilepsy Action was the other one. I had taken part in a football tournament for them before but had always wanted to do something myself to raise money. Aside from fundraising in remembrance of Jordan, who was only a year younger than me when he passed away, I also wanted people to know more about epilepsy.”
Luke will officially complete his 365-day cold-water challenge on November 30, with his last chilly dip as part of that taking place at Brompton Bay, Bangor on Saturday moring at 9.30am. However, he will also be joining in with Action Mental Health’s Festive Splash on Sunday and encouraged everyone to give it a go.
“I would say, definitely go for it!” he said. “Challenge yourself. Get out of your comfort zone and experience something new. It’s the feeling you get afterwards as well – like you’re invincible after doing something you thought there was no chance you could do.
“People think the water’s going to be freezing but at this time of year it’s not as bad. The sea’s been heating up slightly over the summer. It’ll still be cold, of course, but March is actually the coldest time for the water.”
Adding that, “when you get out of the water, that’s when the cold really hits you,” Luke said that he preferred to let his body warm up again naturally after his ice baths and cold-water dips.
“I think that’s how you benefit most from it,” he said. “I also don’t have time in the mornings… I just do the cold dip and then get out the door! I think I would keep doing the cold-water immersion now, even with the challenge finishing – just not every day. Even a cold shower in the morning is good.
“I just wanted to be mentally stronger – putting myself out of my comfort zone and really challenging myself. At the start, I had this wee voice in my head saying, ‘you don’t want to get into this freezing water’. I think overcoming that is building resilience… making you mentally stronger.
How cold-water dips boost wellbeing
With outdoor or ‘wild swimming’ an increasingly popular pastime, ice-baths and similar cold-water immersion methods are other ways in which people have embraced the benefits of cold-water exposure for their health. Also referred to as ‘cold-water therapy,’ it essentially involves immersing yourself in water below 15°C and can include taking an ice-bath, a cold shower or swimming outdoors – generally, for just a few minutes at a time.
While it’s important to be aware of any medical issues that you might have before attempting this, cold-water exposure is thought to be beneficial in various ways, reducing muscle pain and stiffness as well as improving blood pressure and cholesterol levels. From a mental health perspective, while there appears to be no proven or definitive clinical consensus on the effects of cold-water immersion on mental wellbeing, many people have said it has helped to reduce the symptoms of depression, as well as improving their overall wellbeing. If done outside and with other people, then the effects of being in nature, being active and socialising could also play into any positive mental wellbeing experienced.
“Cold water puts your body under stress,” says Dr Samantha Wild, Clinical Lead for Women’s Health and Bupa GP. “This is how it’s believed to produce many of the positive effects, like boosting the immune system.” [1]
It’s important to warm up gradually after a cold-water dip, removing wet garments, drying off and getting dressed again into warm layers. Avoid taking a hot shower or bath, as the abrupt change in temperature can be dangerous. Having a warm drink and eating something sweet afterwards is also helpful in regulating your body temperature again.
A study by Yankouskaya et al. (2023) recorded feedback from 39 adults who were asked to spend five minutes in a 20°C bath. Although this is slightly higher then 15°C it was found that participants “felt more active, alert, attentive, proud and inspired and less distressed and nervous after having a cold-water bath.” The study also stated that, “the changes in positive emotions were associated with the coupling between brain areas involved in attention control, emotion and self-regulation.”
“I find that usually about three minutes is enough time in the water for me,” said Luke. “I was always aiming for the five-minute mark with my dips. To get the real benefits mentally and physically you need about 20 minutes a week, I think.”
Throughout the past year, Luke has mixed up his cold-water immersions with ice baths at home alongside open-water dips at various locations across Northern Ireland, including the North Coast, Newcastle and Bangor.
“My recommendations for places to go cold-water dipping would be Bloody Bridge near the Mournes, Tullymore Forest Park and Glenoe Waterfall in the Glens of Antrim,” he said. “I actually love natural river water more than the sea. You never think about how beautiful this country is until you go and experience places like that. Just getting out in nature will help you mentally as well.
“I think if you’re somebody who suffers from anxiety then overcoming something like a cold-water dip can help with that. A guy once told me that, ‘doing this every day, that’s the hardest thing you will do. Then, when you go to do something else you’re anxious about, you can think, well, I’ve already overcome something difficult – I’ve done the ice bath.’ It makes the thing that you’re anxious about seem less intimidating. That’s the other aspect to it. It puts things in perspective.”
Committed to the cause, Luke also maintained his cold-water challenge when he went abroad, even bringing an inflatable ice bath with him on holiday to Egypt to make sure he didn’t miss a day.
“That was the first time I was away from Northern Ireland since the challenge began,” he said. “I then went to Belgium and there was a bath there, so that was ok. When I went to America with my family there was an ice dispenser, so I kept filling up the bath with ice from that. I knew people had donated to me so I didn’t want to let anybody down!”
With an initial fundraising goal of £300, Luke has now raised more than £1,900 and said he was hopeful of hitting the £2K mark by this weekend.
“A lot of people have been supporting me and I’ll be splitting the money between Action Mental Health and Epilepsy Action,” he said. “I didn’t expect that amount of support. It was a bit daunting at the start, as I just kept questioning myself, but I got into a routine and in the second half of the year I’ve been doing the ice baths straight after getting up.
“Ultimately, it’s about doing something now that will benefit you in the future. For me, I now see the discipline, resilience and the mental strength that I’ve developed.”
Luke added that there was also a social aspect to cold-water swimming and dips, which was another great reason for getting involved, as this further supported your mental as well as physical health.
“I see groups meeting up to go into the water and think that it’s a really nice opportunity to have a chat with your friends and discuss your day or whatever troubles you might be having,” he said. “That’s really good for your mental health. Also, like a lot of people, I’m addicted to my phone, but if you’re in an ice bath, for example, then it’s just you and your thoughts, which I think is really good for you too. That time alone without distractions is healthy.”
Action Mental Health’s Festive Splash takes place on Sunday, December 1 at Crawfordsburn Beach, with registration opening at 10.30am. There will be a short warm-up with Gill Drummond Zumba from 10.45am, with the dip then taking place at approximately 11.05am, following a short safety briefing. You can also enjoy musical entertainment from the Bangor Ukes group from 11am-11.30am, while free tea/coffee and sweet treats will be provided post-dip by Clandeboye Lodge.
For our third blog as part of Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, we spoke to Ross Anderson, who features in our “I AM SOMEONE” campaign and is a very active mental health advocate.
Having experienced various mental health struggles from a young age, Ross accessed the services at Action Mental Health a couple of years ago, attending at our Lisburn location. Since then, his confidence and overall wellbeing have improved drastically and he’s gone from not being able to leave his house, to getting out and about, speaking about mental health and raising awareness of this and the support available.
When it comes to men’s mental health specifically, Ross said there were a lot of stereotypes and outdated narratives around what it meant to be a man and how men handled their emotions, which had a negative impact upon their wellbeing.
Ross is an active mental health advocate. [Photo by Philip Magowan/Press Eye].
“Men have a lost identity,” he said. “That’s a really big crisis at the moment. What is a man’s identity and what does it actually mean to be a man? This younger generation doesn’t have the same opportunities or needs as their parents had, so they’re not really sure what it means to be a man today. They don’t really have those positive role models – for example, how to be a man without the ‘macho’ side of things. And gender is more fluid now, too, so social norms aren’t really a reality anymore.
“For the younger generation, it’s about understanding what is it to be a person and how to be a man and how to move forward with that. It’s got to be something that will change over time.”
Reflecting on the fact that “we have a particularly progressive youth,” Ross added that a key factor in helping to maintain good mental health in males was for men to let go of the stereotypical idea of masculinity.
“It’s just about being who you are,” he said. “My dad is a really good example of this. He knows when to be gentle and kind and how to take care of people. How to take care of those less fortunate than himself. My granda was the same.”
Impact of stereotypes, stigma and trauma legacy
For the older generations of men in Northern Ireland, the deep-rooted stereotypes and traditional male role within society, however, are often very much ingrained. There is also the legacy of the Troubles to contend with, which further contributes to mental health problems. Indeed, in a review of mental health figures in Northern Ireland in 2021, the Office for Statistics Regulation stated: “The legacy of violence and socio-economic factors are frequently cited as key contributors to poor mental health in the Northern Ireland population.” [1]
Research generated from 1,000 men polled across the UK [2] shows that 40% have never spoken to anyone about their mental health – despite the fact that 77% of these men have experienced symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress.
The reasons given for not talking about their mental health or seeking help were due to the following:
Not wanting to be a burden(36%)
Embarrassment (29%)
The stigma surrounding mental health (20%)
Not wanting to admit they needed support (17%)
Not wanting to appear weak (14%)
Meanwhile, a report from Devine (2024) – Men’s Health in Numbers: Northern Ireland Men’s Health Report Card 2024 – revealed that 37% of men had long-term physical or mental conditions/illnesses lasting or expected to last 12 months or more in 2022/23. [3] A further 19% of men were recorded as having low or medium levels of satisfaction with life, while 18% scored highly on the GHQ-12 scale, indicating a mental health problem. Of these men, 14% were aged between 35-44 years or were 65 years+, with 24% aged 45-54.
“Men in their 40s, 50s and 60s are in that traditional structured role, but in a less stable environment these days,” said Ross. “Because they’re already in that structure and lifestyle, it’s really hard for them, so they’re struggling because they have so many people relying on them. Then there’s the stigma. That’s where it can sometimes turn into drug and alcohol abuse.”
Indeed, 1,989 men were treated for problem alcohol or drug use in Northern Ireland in 2022/23, with 67% of those being treated in the country overall during that time males.
“It’s a very difficult thing and a very deep-rooted problem, which we need to look at,” said Ross. “With younger men, there’s a lack of education and awareness, with no positive counter message in relation to gender identity from the government or education. It’s really frustrating to see. Our wider culture is taking advantage of vulnerable young men.”
He added that men of all ages often didn’t know where to go to seek help for their mental health, which was another issue. Not recognising the signs of poor mental health “or realising they’re not just stressed but actually have some trauma that’s causing this,” was another factor to consider.
According to Devine (2024), the leading cause of death (69%) for 15-34 year-old males in Northern Ireland is “external causes of injury … (including accidents, suicide and intentional self-harm).” For men aged 35-54 years, this percentage is 23.7%, while for males aged 65 years+, mental and behavioural disorders are the cause of 8.4% of deaths.
It’s important to remember that behind each of these statistics is a real person with friends and family – and that their loss of life leaves behind devastation within communities. It’s therefore vital that men receive the support they need for their mental health and that they know how to access this and aren’t worried about seeking out that help.
Awareness days and initiatives like Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month in November, while perhaps overdone, can subsequently be helpful in promoting available support services and signposting men to the help they need, said Ross.
“As much as people can get a little bit lethargic with the amount of awareness days going on, they still do provide a good point of connection within communities and can introduce people to others with similar issues,” he said.
“It’s good because it kind of forces politicians and people out there to comment on it. It puts pressure on them to take action in that sense. So, I think it’s good in that regard. It opens up conversations in general and in the media, which is always good. “As a society, we’re kind of learning and progressing which, ultimately, has to be a good thing.”
Ross at the “I AM SOMEONE” launch at Stormont with fellow former Action Mental Health clients, Vicky and Deirdre. [Photo by Philip Magowan/Press Eye].
If you need someone to talk to …
If you’re struggling with your mental health, then it’s important to speak with someone – and help is out there, should you need it. If you’re in crisis, then talk to your GP, as they can diagnose conditions and outline possible treatment options. You can also contact the organisations below at any time.
Minding Your Head: Access information about mental health and the issues that can affect it, along with tips on how to maintain good mental health. www.mindingyourhead.info/
Lifeline: A Free 24-hour crisis response helpline for people who are experiencing distress or despair, where trained counsellors will listen and help immediately on the phone and follow up with other support if necessary. Tel: 0808 808 8000 / www.lifelinehelpline.info
Samaritans: A registered charity aimed at providing emotional support to anyone in emotional distress, struggling to cope, or at risk of suicide throughout UK and Ireland, often through their telephone helpline or online chat. Freephone: 116 123 / www.samaritans.org/
[3] Devine, P. (2024). Men’s Health in Numbers: Northern Ireland Men’s Health Report Card 2024. Dublin: Men’s Health Forum in Ireland. Available at: https://www.mhfi.org/MensHealthInNumbers3.pdf
For our second blog this Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, we paid a visit to one of Action Mental Health’s three Men’s Sheds, to chat with the members and find out why they love going along…
(L-R) Seamus, Sean, Russell, David, Eric, Chris, Joe and Gerry.
Known affectionately as ‘the Shedders,’ the team at Men’s Shed Steeple Antrim, which sees an average 15-20 people attend four days a week, are a very welcoming – and busy – bunch. With a focus on fun, friendship and learning new skills, the Shedders do everything from woodcarving, photography and cooking to singing, pyrography and much more.
Having won the Community Champion award from the South Antrim Community network in 2024 for “creating opportunities to build capacity or bring innovative ideas to the community,” this is a group which benefits both members and the wider community.
Gerry is a longstanding member of Men’s Shed Steeple Antrim.
It’s clear from the outset just how much everyone enjoys coming to the Shed during the week, with one member saying that, “We have a great community.” Other members add that the Men’s Shed “gives us a purpose” and that “it’s all about having fun.”
A longstanding member of Men’s Shed Steeple Antrim, Gerry was one of the first to join the group, when it launched around a decade ago. The Men’s Shed phenomenon had reached Northern Ireland and Action Mental Health decided to set one up in Antrim. Having recently retired, Gerry found out about the plans for the Steeple Antrim Shed from his daughter, who was working at Action Mental Health at the time. She suggested he go along but he wasn’t very keen, initially.
“I didn’t want to be retired and be around old people, so I didn’t go,” he said. “But it was going to fold if they didn’t get enough members, so I came up. I got some people to join and never looked back.”
As one of Northern Ireland’s first Men’s Sheds, he said that Antrim Steeple led the way at that time and was a great place to mix with people and meet new friends – which, of course, it still is.
“I enjoy the craic,” he said. “I was always used to getting up early for work so it’s a reason to get out of bed and come in and meet your friends in here. Some of us actually socialise outside of here as well! We’d maybe get the train to Dublin for the day.
“The craic is good and there’s the freedom to go down to the garden too, amongst the plants. What would the men be doing, otherwise?”
Some of the Shedders’ artwork.
Magic moments down in the Shed
With recent research [1] revealing that 17% of men in Northern Ireland showed signs of loneliness in 2022/23 – 20% of these aged between 55-64 and 16% aged 65-74 years old – initiatives like the Men’s Shed are an ideal way to help combat this. Creating community spaces where men can gather to enjoy a cup of tea and some craic – as well as the opportunity to take part in a whole host of activities (optional, of course), is a concept which obviously works.
Ronald enjoys entertaining the Shedders with magic tricks.
Ronald, who’s originally from South Africa but is now settled in Northern Ireland, joined Men’s Shed Steeple Antrim a year ago and keeps the crew entertained with his magic tricks, which he happily demonstrated during our visit.
“My library told me about the Men’s Shed, so I thought I would come and check it out,” he said. “It gets me out of the house. When I don’t come here, I go lawn bowling.”
Russell is another Shedder who has been part of the Antrim Steeple group for just over a year, having heard about it when he was seeking employment support. Describing himself as an anxious person, he said it was a couple of months before he managed to get along but that, once he did, he wished he’d done it sooner, as he enjoyed it so much.
“I was suffering from depression and anxiety,” he said. “Getting your feet in the door is the hardest part but one day I just got it into my head to go. I was walking by and called in. I wish I had done it earlier.
“I was doing courses with the ESA – getting back to work schemes – but they weren’t for me. I found this better – more relaxed. This place is completely different. You can take your time at things. When I came, I initially thought, ‘what have I got myself into here?’ I didn’t know anybody at all. It’s daunting at the start. I was always a quiet person so it’s brought me out of myself a bit.”
Explaining that his approach now in life is to take everything as it comes, Russell said that when new members come to the Shed, they can always expect to be made welcome with a cup of tea and some chat.
Coming to the Men’s Shed has helped Russell’s confidence.
He added: “It’s up to the individual, though – you have to be ready for it. I think men don’t come sometimes because they’re scared.”
Reflecting on the fact that November is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, Russell said he thought it was difficult with men – particularly those from previous generations – as they often bottled things up and didn’t address their mental health.
“Some older men don’t like talking about things,” he said. “They keep everything in. I didn’t talk much at the start [when I came to the Shed] because I didn’t want to bother anyone. But people listen. Everyone here’s in the same boat. They’re a good crowd of people.”
With his favourite aspect of the Men’s Shed the various activities, Russell added that he’d learned lots of new skills and done all sorts of things he’d never tried before – or thought he would, such as wood-carving and painting.
Seamus with one of the stools he made.
Murray making the sign for the festive post box.
“There’s always new things to try out,” he said. “For example, Francesca from Action Mental Health did a course with us that I found helped with my anxiety. I try everything. I would do a lot of the OCN courses and am part of the gardening group too. It gets your mind working again and gives you more confidence.”
At the time of our visit, the Shedders were adding the finishing touches to a Christmas post box they’d made for a local supermarket, while they also had a herd of wooden reindeer lined up and ready to go on display at the Enchanted Winter Garden in Antrim.
The Shedders have made a festive post box for Christmas.
Chris is a dab hand at jigsaws.
“It’s about going out into the community as well,” said one of the men. “They give us a donation but it’s not only about selling what we have. We’ll be talking about the Shed as well and letting people know about it.”
Whether it’s getting out and about to spread the word about the Men’s Shed, enjoying a cup of tea and conversation or getting stuck into gardening or general grafting, it seems the Shedders are on to a good thing…
The Shedders will be selling their Christmas crafts on Friday, November 29 at St Joseph’s Parish Community Hall in Antrim from 6pm-8pm.
The Men’s Shed Steeple Antrim meets Monday-Wednesday and on Fridays and is funded by the National Lottery’s Community Fund.
Reference: [1] Devine, P. (2024). Men’s Health in Numbers: Northern Ireland Men’s Health Report Card 2024. Dublin: Men’s Health Forum in Ireland. Available at: https://www.mhfi.org/MensHealthInNumbers3.pdf
Seamus shows some of the artwork the men have created.
(L-R) David Babington, Action Mental Health CEO; Siobhan O’Neill, NI’s Mental Health Champion; Education Minister Paul Givan MLA; Paul Beattie, Director of Programmes, Managing Authority at the SEUPB.
The OUR Generation Project was officially launched in Belfast on Wednesday, November 13, supported by Northern Ireland’s Education Minister, Paul Givan, MLA, who said it was a “critically important” initiative which would support many young people.
Also attending the event at the New Forge Sports Complex and Event Hub were project partners, funders and supporters. These included the Director of Programmes, Managing Authority at the Special EU Programmes Body (SEUPB), Paul Beattie and Social Psychology Lecturer at Ulster University, Dr Claire Campbell.
Opening the proceedings, Minister Givan said he was delighted to have been able to attend and that he thought it was important he supported the event.
Describing OUR Generation as an “important programme,” he said that with “a continued rise in mental health issues amongst young people,” the project would “create significant opportunities” and deliver much welcomed additional mental health support.
Education Minister, Paul Givan MLA.
“The demand on existing mental health and wellbeing initiatives has been significant and because of this funding more young people will benefit,” he said. “For many young people, access to high-quality programmes for mental health has changed their lives and in some cases, has saved lives. It makes a lasting and positive change for communities.
“Often, the work that you do can be unseen by outside society… But that network is critically important in our society. It’s vital we can support that.”
Reflecting on his own life, Minister Givan added that everyone faced challenges and difficult days, posing the question – how do we get through it?
“Challenges will always come in your life,” he said. “Creating that resilience is so important, especially for our young people. If you don’t provide the right support at the right time, that can take you down into dark places. My grandmother took her own life when my father was 16 years of age… I never got to know her. It got to the point where she wasn’t able to cope anymore.”
Reflecting on the fact that people will “always face really difficult, dark moments in their lives,” Minister Givan said it was therefore important to support our young people – particularly in “a world where there’s so much uncertainty.”
“How do you support people to come through those difficulties and challenges? That next generation – how do we support them? That’s why I just want to say thank you for all the work you’re doing. I really look forward to seeing the outcomes of the project.”
The latest phase of the project will run from 2024-2027, taking place in various education, youth and community settings across Northern Ireland and the border counties of Ireland. It will subsequently develop and deliver programmes focused on increasing mental health literacy, enhancing emotional resilience and building leadership skills in children and young people aged between nine and 25 years old. The project will also lead on research into mental health and the impact of trauma upon our communities.
It is anticipated that approximately 33,000 children and young people, along with 5,000 key youth workers will participate in the project overall.
Paul Beattie, Director of Programmes, Managing Authority at the SEUPB.
Paul Beattie, the Director of Programmes, Managing Authority at the Special EU Programmes Body (SEUPB), said it was important that one of their six key themes was dedicated to empowering young people.
“By involving young people we’re empowering them to act as ambassadors within their communities,” he said.
He added that investing in projects like OUR Generation gave a focus to community leadership, as well as helping to sustain peace and good relations, supporting young people living with the legacy of the Troubles.
“Overall, the project will make a contribution to peace and reconciliation,” he said. “There’s an increasing demand to impact the mental health of young people and we really look forward to seeing the immense work of OUR Generation in touching the lives of more young people.”
Panel discussion
Following a brief video about the OUR Generation Project, which featured messages from the various partners, a panel discussion was facilitated by host, Curtis McCosh, from Cool FM. Taking part was Youth Wellbeing Specialist and counsellor, Sinead McIlvenna from Belfast charity, Lighthouse, along with Youth Project Coordinator, Mick Meehan, from North Belfast charity, Tackling Awareness of Mental Health Issues (TAMHI). Joining them was Stephen O’Donnell a volunteer from Donegal Youth Service (DYS) and Adam Murphy from Youth Action NI (YANI).
Host, Curtis McCosh, from Cool FM.
(L-R) Sinead McIlvenna from Lighthouse, Mick Meehan, from TAMHI, Stephen O’Donnell from Donegal Youth Service and Adam Murphy from Youth Action NI.
Having been introduced to the OUR Generation project through Cooperation Ireland, Sinead said they had done various work with young people as part of this, including around gender awareness. She added that trauma-informed counselling had been very beneficial to the young people they worked with in schools, while laughter yoga had also been a hit.
“Laughter yoga is brilliant, as some kids are very shy and introverted,” she said. “It really helps the kids engage. Laughter is very infectious, so when one person laughs, everyone laughs. Cooperation Ireland offered us the training, so we’re now all trained in laughter yoga.
She added that the leadership conference which had taken place in Derry-Londonderry previously, had been “amazing” as an opportunity to see how other organisations were working.
This was a point reiterated by Mick from TAMHI, who said that, “getting to actually meet other organisations and do some collaborative work was first-class.” He added that being part of OUR Generation to date had enabled them to deliver cross-border play schemes, helping them further in fulfilling their objective as a charity, which was to “shape change and save lives.”
“We teach mental health through play,” he said. “You go in and ‘play out’ hardship and then explain it through play. You can do it from primary school level right up to the highest pay grade. When we were invited up to Derry-Londonderry it was brilliant to go into a room and see so many positive people – and to meet some amazing people through the programme.”
Having come up with OUR Generation’s tagline of ‘Growing up better, together,’ fellow panelist, Adam, from YANI has been involved in youth work from a young age. He said it was great to have gone from being an OUR Generation project participant to a volunteer to now being a peer educator.
“The project helps you to learn new things and meet new people,” he said, adding that OUR Generation had made a massive difference to his work within the youth sector, opening up opportunities across wider Northern Ireland.
“A lot of the times, rural young people can feel they’re not being heard,” he said. “Being able to be involved in those conversations and then to go back into my local community means I can say, ‘this is where it’s going’. That’s had a massive positive impact on their outlook.”
Concluding the panel discussion, Stephen from DYS said that OUR Generation was a vital project for highlighting mental health resilience. He added that it gave “young people the power to understand that, if something is going wrong, there’s coping skills and methodologies to get through what’s going on.” “Through talking, it will give you the chance to slowly come through and find your feet again,” he said.
Diverse social groups key for mental health
Also speaking at the launch was Dr Claire Campbell from OUR Generation partner, Ulster University, who highlighted the importance of social group membership for good mental and physical health. Using a practical activity to illustrate the point, Dr Campbell said that social identity theory showed people were “hard-wired for group membership.”
Dr Claire Campbell from Ulster University.
She added: “With more social group membership you have better physical and mental health, emotional wellbeing, quality of life, coping and resilience.” She added, however, that it was important to not only be part of social groups, but for those to be “across communities, not just in your own,” to ensure higher social identity complexity and a more open-minded attitude.
Preceding the final element of the day, which was a vocal performance of Unwritten from Cori Strain (YANI), David Babington – CEO of lead partner Action Mental Health – made the event’s closing remarks and wished the project well.
“Having just recently launched our “I AM SOMEONE” fundraising and mental health awareness campaign, we at Action Mental Health are all too aware of the very real stories behind the mental health statistics,” he said. “Statistics which, unfortunately, are still quite bleak – with one in five adults experiencing a mental health issue in their lifetimes and one in eight children facing emotional difficulties.
David Babington, CEO at Action Mental Health.
“Indeed, Northern Ireland continues to have some of the highest rates of mental ill-health in the UK and transgenerational trauma is a significant part of this. That’s why projects such as OUR Generation are so important – to safeguard the mental health and emotional resilience of the next generation and to equip them with leadership and life skills which they can carry forward into a more hopeful future.”
David added that the project would complement the great work already taking place within the mental health sector in Northern Ireland and that the programmes would “ultimately give youth a voice and allow them and their communities to be heard, regardless of religion, race, gender, identity or background.”
OUR Generation is supported by PEACEPLUS, a programme managed by the Special EU Programmes Body (SEUPB). PEACEPLUS represents a funding partnership between the European Union, the Government of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland, the Government of Ireland and the Northern Ireland Executive.
While our mental health matters all-year round, dedicated awareness days, weeks and months are great for shining a spotlight on particular issues and helping to raise awareness of these. They help to get people talking about subjects previously often deemed taboo and act as signposts to vital services which can support those who are struggling.
November is one such month, with both International Stress Awareness Week, Stress Awareness Day and Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month all taking place.
According to the Office for Statistics Regulation, a review of mental health statistics in Northern Ireland shows that: “The legacy of violence and socio-economic factors are frequently cited as key contributors to poor mental health.” [1] With Northern Ireland subsequently having some of the highest rates of mental ill-health in the UK, supporting men in this area is crucial, particularly when they’re often less likely to seek help in relation to their mental health.
Research shows that in 2022, 156 men took their own lives in Northern Ireland [3] – each of these a person with friends and family who subsequently suffered a devastating loss. There are many reasons why someone may suffer from poor mental health, but opening up conversations around this is key to helping reduce the stigma around this and to encourage men to seek support.
As part of Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month, it’s important to remember that both men and women experience a wide range of mental health issues. However, due to societal habits and traditions, men often don’t talk about how they feel, or seek out help when they need it.
What men think about their mental health
Research from Priory [2], the UK’s leading independent provider of mental healthcare and adult social care, surveyed 1,000 men across the UK to find out more about how they thought about their mental health. They found that 40% of men had never spoken to anyone about their mental health, despite the fact that 77% of those polled said they had experienced symptoms of depression, anxiety and stress.
A further 40% of UK men said they would only be motivated to seek professional mental health support if they had thoughts about taking their own life, or of self-harm. The figures also revealed that the reasons men stated for not discussing their mental health or seeking help were because they felt “too embarrassed” to talk about it (29%) and because of the stigma surrounding mental health issues (20%).
Other reasons included men not wanting to be a burden on anyone else (36%), not wanting to admit that they needed support (17%) and not wanting to appear weak (14%). A further 40% said they had “learnt to deal with it,” while 14% said they had no one to talk to.”
The top causes of poor mental health in the men surveyed were:
Work (32%)
Finances (31%)
Health (23%)
With Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month falling just before Christmas, it’s also significant to note that amongst men aged 35-44, the pressure/cost of the festive season also contributed to their poor mental health.
Signs of poor mental health in men
While men and women experience the same symptoms for mental health conditions, the research shows that some of these are more often found in men – so it’s good to be aware of what they are.
Commonly shared symptoms include things such as feeling constantly overwhelmed and sad, withdrawing from friends and family and experiencing persistent worry. Feeling fatigued, as well as finding it difficult to concentrate and having headaches or being short of breath can also be signs to watch out for.
When it comes to men’s mental health, however, additional factors (which again, can also occur in women but are usually more prevalent in men) often include substance abuse, working obsessively and sleep issues, as well as being angry and more irritable. Men can also be more likely to engage in reckless behaviour when struggling with their mental health.
According to Devine (2024) 1,989 men were treated for problem alcohol or drug use in Northern Ireland in 2022/23, with 67% of these being males. [3]
In addition to this, it was found that “19% of men had low or medium levels of satisfaction with life, while 18% of men had a high score on the GHQ-12 scale, indicating a mental health problem. 14% of these men were aged between 35-44 or 65 years+, with 24% of them aged 45-54.”
Tips if you’re a man struggling with his mental health
There are various things you can do if you’re struggling with your mental health, one of which is speaking with a professional. Talking to anyone – be it a friend, family member, your GP or a mental health charity – is so important. Meanwhile, there are also various coping strategies which you can do on your own alongside this, to help keep support your mental health in the day-to-day.
The Five Ways to Wellbeing are a great place to start and are focused on connecting with people, getting active, taking notice of things around you, learning a new skill and giving.
Here are some ways to help your mental health, if you’re struggling:
Socialise: Connecting with other people gets us out of our own heads and prevents us from feeling lonely, which is when negative thoughts or bouts of ruminative thinking can often occur. By engaging with other people, be it friends, family or taking a walk and saying hello to a stranger, being social helps us keep things in perspective and reminds us that we’re not alone.
Be active: Whether it’s going for a run, walk or heading down to the gym, when we move, it helps us feel good, as our brain releases endorphins. So, any movement is good – just get up and go outside as a first step. Once you start moving, the next step becomes easier.
Reduce your alcohol intake: While socialising with friends is great, cutting down on alcohol will help your mental health, as drinking has depressive effects and, if you’re already feeling low, it will only add to this. It might be hard to say ‘no’ if you’re stressed and it’s become your go-to ‘crutch,’ but try to swap out alcohol for a soft drink or non-alcoholic version – or do something which doesn’t involve drinking at all, if you’re meeting friends.
Learn some relaxation techniques: If you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed then simply taking notice of five things around you – things you can touch, see, hear or smell, for example – can ground you and focus your mind in the moment. Focusing on your breathing is another good way to relax – try breathing in for a count of four and then extending your outward breath for longer than this. The longer outward breath will help you to feel more relaxed, calming your parasympathetic nervous system.
If you need someone to talk to …
If you’re struggling with your mental health, then it’s important to speak with someone – and help is out there, should you need it. If you’re in crisis, then talk to your GP, as they can diagnose conditions and outline possible treatment options. You can also contact the organisations below at any time.
Minding Your Head: Access information about mental health and the issues that can affect it, along with tips on how to maintain good mental health. www.mindingyourhead.info/
Lifeline: A Free 24-hour crisis response helpline for people who are experiencing distress or despair, where trained counsellors will listen and help immediately on the phone and follow up with other support if necessary. Tel: 0808 808 8000 / www.lifelinehelpline.info
Samaritans: A registered charity aimed at providing emotional support to anyone in emotional distress, struggling to cope, or at risk of suicide throughout UK and Ireland, often through their telephone helpline or online chat. Freephone: 116 123 / www.samaritans.org/
[3] Devine, P. (2024). Men’s Health in Numbers: Northern Ireland Men’s Health Report Card 2024. Dublin: Men’s Health Forum in Ireland. Available at: https://www.mhfi.org/MensHealthInNumbers3.pdf
The beginning of November marks International Stress Awareness Week (with Stress Awareness Day on November 6), which aims to raise awareness about stress, as well as highlighting ways in which we can combat it. With the theme for World Mental Health Day this year also centred around burnout and improving mental health in the workplace, if you’re experiencing any of these issues then it’s important to know that help is out there.
When Kapeela – a young professional working far from home in Northern Ireland during the pandemic – found her mental health deteriorating due to stress and related issues, she realised that she needed support.
Having moved to Northern Ireland seven years ago to study, Kapeela, now aged 28, had been in employment for the past four years, with things going well for her during that time. However, a series of stressful experiences, including working during the pandemic, along with a relationship breakup, new job and moving into a new home, ultimately took its toll on her mental health.
Initially, it was the pandemic which impacted upon her mental health, prompting Kapeela to seek private counselling.
“It was difficult being away from family,” she said. “That was my first instance with ill mental health. I got private therapy and managed to go home for a while and then when I came back, life was back to normal.”
In 2023, however, Kapeela bought a new home while simultaneously taking on a new job. She was also newly single, all of which negatively affected her mental health and prompted her to contact her GP for help.
“It was a very stressful time in my life but also, financially, it was quite difficult for me to access private therapy,” she said. “It was quite an isolating time and I didn’t feel I had the right support in place to keep me going. So, that’s why I got in touch with my GP and they referred me to Action Mental Health and I then had therapy for six weeks through Action Mental Health.
“I was able to have talking therapy consistently every week with my counsellor. We went through lots of helpful tools – working on guilt, shame, self-esteem. I had that nine months ago and am still able to apply most of those tools to my day-to-day life. It made a huge impact and I really needed it, so I was grateful that the service was there and accessible and free. I definitely benefitted from it.”
Finding a safe space
Having reached out for help when she was “at breaking point,” Kapeela said that attending therapy at Action Mental Health had been a “very cathartic” experience.
“I was nervous,” she said. “But it was a very safe space. It was online and I definitely felt that I was in good hands. My therapist was very experienced and knew how to work with me. I think during those six weeks it was a very helpful experience.”
Due to her experience with therapy previously, Kapeela added that she was keen to ask her counsellor this time around for more information about mental health – and to really delve into the tools and techniques that could help her. Her sessions subsequently looked at, amongst other things, addressing Kapeela’s core beliefs, as well as discussing areas such as guilt, shame and self-esteem.
“My counsellor was able to provide me with tried and tested methods of training to cope with my core beliefs,” she said. “She was able to answer my questions and was available through email as well. She told me to contact her any time during those six weeks. She also encouraged me to journal and to bring (what I wrote) along to the therapy sessions so we could discuss them. It felt like a very involved experience – like we were in it together trying to cope with the issues. I was then able to lean on others a lot more, too.
“After the therapy sessions ended I realised what my coping mechanisms might be. They highlighted my strengths – that were really inside of me the whole time – and I was able to rely on myself a bit more and have more confidence in myself to use those tools and get back to my day-to-day life.”
Ultimately, Kapeela said that her therapy experience with Action Mental Health had helped her to share her problems and to feel less alone when at the time, she’d felt the opposite. She added that being able to lean on other people had also removed that feeling of having the “entire weight of the world on your shoulders.”
“It can feel very isolating when you think that your problems are not relatable to somebody else, but speaking to a talking therapist… they’re able to get to the crux of the situation and to draw things out of you and work through it with you,” she said. “That’s something my therapist at Action Mental Health was able to do.”
Supporting the “I AM SOMEONE” campaign
As someone who has benefitted from the support offered by Action Mental Health, Kapeela said she was delighted to have been able to give back by assisting with the “I AM SOMEONE” campaign. With private therapy too expensive for her previously, she added that removing the financial barrier and accessing the free services at Action Mental Health had enabled her to seek professional help when she needed it.
“Donating to the service would mean someone else doesn’t need to think about that either,” she said. “I would just like to say thank you to Action Mental Health and I’m just very grateful that there’s opportunities for us to volunteer as well – to be able to give back. We [often] think we only have to give money but you can give your time and you can be compassionate to somebody else. It’s so rewarding.”
She added that the “I AM SOMEONE” campaign was “going to be so helpful for people to realise that the service is out there” for those willing to take that first step and ask for help.
“It’s accessible, it’s free, it’s easy to get in touch with Action Mental Health, so I would really just recommend anyone who’s struggling at the minute to ask for help,” she said. “It gets easier.”
Looking to the future
Now in a much better place with her mental health, Kapeela said that she was ultimately reassured by the fact that the support from Action Mental Health was still out there, if she needed it again.
“That in itself provides a bit of security to me,” she said. “Knowing that I’ve benefitted from the service and can still access it if needed and that there’s still somebody out there who can listen to me and provide that support.
“But in the past nine months I’ve been able to go back to work and engage in tasks and activities I wasn’t really able to engage in when I was feeling quite low. So, I’ve managed to regain that aspect of my life through therapy and have the confidence to go back to my day-to-day life.”
While she still does miss her family and home, Kapeela has various mementos, which she said had helped her alongside the therapeutic support. These include photographs of her family, given to her as part of care package that also contained messages, along with art from her nieces and nephews and letters.
“It was a surprise, as I didn’t know any of it was coming,” she said. “They gave it to me when I left at the airport, so that was really special.”
Meanwhile, her new home in Northern Ireland is one that also provides its own support, as Kapeela loves getting out in nature and enjoying the many green and coastal spaces here.
“I work in a very busy environment and being out in nature, it’s so tranquil, so serene,” she said. “I love being by the beach. Being able to connect with nature is very important to me and I think that’s something Northern Ireland has an abundance of – nature, seaside, scenery – it’s one of the reasons I’ve stayed on and haven’t gone back to another busy city. I really enjoy being in Northern Ireland.”
Reflecting on her progress to date, Kapeela added that her life was a lot more settled now and that she was no longer the lonely person she had been when she was struggling with her mental health.
“I definitely feel that that part of my life is something I’ve gone through but that it’s not a part that I’m going through at the minute,” she said. “Therapy definitely helped me to move on from feeling that low – and whenever those feelings come up again, I know I’m able to navigate through them with the support of my family and the tools I’ve gained from therapy.
“I feel I’m in a much better place now, which is great.”
